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Black Heart Healing

If my eyes can open eyes up then I can get up
Did any of y’all 2024 end in a catalytic disaster. Mine did. It was definitely nuclear but the beauty of what I experienced and have gained can never be replaced.
So where to begin…I know
I was forced into hibernation by the Most High and I almost gave myself hypothermia fighting him.
They say that your biggest enemy is you…the inner me…and it’s so true.
Reflecting now, as the spring is starting to sprout these buds from seeds of yesteryear, I had to learn these valuable lessons for me to be able to become equipped with the tools to climb my next mountaintop. I had reached the peak of the pyramid. I was comfortable knowing I wanted more, thirsted for more, and even prayed for more but I was still trapped. Perched up there out of fear. I was afraid to let go of these internal philosophies, thoughts, and habits. I wanted to be free, I thought I was free but I was still just in another part of this labyrinth in my psyche. This jigsaw of a lifetime of who I was constructed to become, how I was cultivated to see, think, speak and move all fell into these pieces. I begin putting up these pieces one by one and examining them. I peered into these puzzle pieces analyzing the pieces of me to truly see. I saw the happy times and the hidden home movies looked in the film vault in the heart.
Man, I have gone from never crying and thinking it is weak to crying at commercials, but I learn it is freeing. It made me sit in that pain, in those thoughts, so I could feel it, learn from it and let it go.
As one of my close friends always says, eat the meat and spit out the bones.
With that said, being free is a process that is more like peeling through an onion then popping a chain. As being, we are complex connections of our spiritual and physical existence that carries trauma, pain, hurt and any other negative emotion you can think of into our bodies from not just this life but others we connect with and beyond. Letting go and releasing these mental chains have to be some of the hardest to release because these shades I wear often block the true picture. However, by focusing on what made me feel safe, comfortable and in control is what was keeping me stuck in this prism pretending.
Pretending…I wanted to break free but it was so warm and cozy in this prism until it got shattered. My life…shattered yet again…but this time the purpose was far greater than I could ever realize.
Sitting here now, I am just glowing as I reflect on the compassion and grace that the Most High has granted me because I lost everything to end 2024
I lost my car, my income, I had to move then I couldn’t find a place and was homeless, and my son was bouncing from place to place and I just remember crying in this rental car in Santa Monica and I gave up and went back to my ex husband. I was broken and didn’t know what to do. This was the best and worst decision I made. I will be revealing more in future segments, but I will say preference this first, my ex husband helped me get back on my feet. He also asked me something:
If I wanted to be great? I said no I wanted to be legendary.
Then he then followed up by stating that
He can make me legendary but I was gonna hate him.
Well, he was right..in certain regards.
He revealed some things that ripped me apart but he also apologized and I didn’t know how much I needed that truth and genuine apology to let go and move on. It was the closure I didn’t know I needed and I'm forever appreciative of him for granting me that.
So in conclusion..I found my fourth wind and I am grateful to the Most High, my ex husband, and each and every person that has helped me to blossom into the Goddess I have become, whether positive or negative. I love and appreciate each and every soul I have had the pleasure to cross paths with.
Lessons learned: In order for me to ascend to enlightenment, I have to be authentic. The path to authenticity is hard, painful and uncharted but it is paved with the frequency of love. Love is for God, Love for all, and Love for self. Letting go and freeing yourself are all a part of the vibration of Love. So let’s all vibrate in Love.
So I’m sending out love to all of those who are fighting and who are trying to find that next wind just remember this…
If your eyes can open up then you can get up…Les Miles
Always Love & Light
The Hidden Lovr
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